He’s an Asshole


My teenager is an ass hole. No, really he is an honest to God ass hole. He is seventeen and knows absolutely every way there is to live, which ways are right and which are wrong. I don’t know how he came upon this wealth of knowledge, considering he has lived at home with his mum for his entire freaking life. It’s a bittersweet reality, he leaves home in approximately 2 months, 28 days, 17 hours and 24 minutes…

We’ve had our ups and downs over the years. Lets just say second or middle child syndrome is a thing! We have been batting head to head for his entire 17 years. Of course, there are moments in between. But man, if I’m not tip-toeing around him or living in a way that he deems fully utilizing myself I’ll hear about it. I have to believe his intentions are good, I just have to. A few weeks ago, about midway into this stay at home Pandemic BS we got into a really heated argument. I don’t even really remember what it was about, but there is now a hole in the wall and a conversation we refuse to have. (He did agree to fix the wall before leaving for college.) 

While his headstrong nature and innate ambition will take him far in life it hasn’t always been easy being his parent. He was the most quiet and easy baby of all my other children combined, he barely made a sound, nursed right away, he never even cried when he fell and bumped his head! Then he turned 8 and it all went downhill from there. Does something happen in the mind around 8 years of age? I should google that.

Mom, do you do anything right? I mean it’s not that complicated!

Last weekend I had some friends over for a backyard cookout/bonfire, it was a very pleasant evening with many laughs! Sitting by the fire, my teen could be seen in his bedroom with some of his friends getting ready to watch a movie. And wouldn’t you know it, I saw him in there (mind you through a window so I couldn’t HEAR him.) I recall my countdown app I have installed on my phone and the time that keeps passing so quickly, and I start bawling. A full on ugly-face cry. While this child drives me absolutely bat-shit crazy, he is also one that I love to hang out with. He is quick witted as hell, and can goof around with the best of us.

My hope is that he will grow some in the next few years while away for school, and come back to me, a little sweeter. If not, he will still be my ass hole.

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